“For example, maybe the mean waitress from the 99’s isn’t so mean after all.” -Transition

“So I’m sitting in this classroom, trying to do this homework that I don’t understand, surrounded by people I barely know, slowly getting more and more frustrated. The more I can’t understand my homework, the more I think about how I don’t know any of these people.” -Repetition

“I get so frustrated that I begin to cry while doing my homework on the 3rd floor of the library, in front of all these people that I don’t know and they don’t know me and all I can think is, ‘I want to go home.'” -Repetition

“But I also need to eat, and I need to shower, and I need to do the dishes, and I need to start my laundry. The problem with this is that now I’m aggravating my frustration even more.” -Pointing word, Repetition

“However, just like the previous events of my day, nothing seems to be going right for me.” -Transition

“But I’m stressed even more now because I hadn’t taken that into account and I still need to finish my homework and take a shower and I miss my mom and dad and I just want to go home. I hate homework and I hate these classes.” -Pointing word, Repetition

“For example, Friday night I was trying to get back to my home from going into Boston. The traffic was bumper to bumper and I had been driving a lot already and I was tired and getting frustrated. As I felt the frustration building up, I paused and looked at all these cars in front of me and thought about DFW’s point of being mindful and self-aware.” -Transition, Repetition

I don’t necessarily see any patterns, but in my personal piece of my essay, I definitely relied more on repetition. This worked out well in my favor, because my personal piece ended up being the strongest part of my essay, and I believe the repetition helped it get there. I don’t believe my passage is hard to follow, but maybe that’s because I am the one that wrote it. I would need to hear from someone who didn’t write this, who is just a reader, to understand if it is hard to follow.